She had no other choice but to forgive him because she loved him.
He always showed up late in her life, each time was a pleasant surprise but now she was someone’s wife.
She made sure over the years to keep him at a safe distance because she once gave him a mile and he took three and that pain dug deep.
What did she have over me? She would ask, when she was only seventeen, speaking about the woman he cheated on her with now they have 2 kids and accumulated nine years of rooted foundation. That was validation to never trust a fucken thing that came out of his mouth…
But when she received a DM from him years later, everything went south. She reached back out and didn’t back down, she decided for the first time to see his face, touch his skin, connect once again but this time, “only as friends”
They sat across from each other, drinking the strongest liquor, blood getting thicker as they filled up their livers so words could flow quicker.
He told her everything she wanted to hear, and she believed everything was true because why else would he be sitting here after eleven years had gone by.
After all, she always looked at him as a friend, a best friend before he became her high school sweetheart.
She remembered their first kiss, getting high before classes, wearing sunglasses to hide their faded eyes, how they talked on the phone all night long, neither one of them hanging up first. Even at his worse, when he would cry on the phone, she would cry with him.
She could never get him out of her system, although she was the victim, she decided long ago to forgive him because they were young. They both had a lot to learn.
In her eyes he was always a Champ. A fighter. A winner. He was smart, charming, alarmingly fine as hell, he was hers and she was his. She was wondering, fuck, why did you have to go off and have kids.
She felt that she would have treated him better than her. She had all the love to offer him plus more. They both had ambition, they were both dreamers, talented as ever.
They were the perfect match but somehow, they could never keep the fire alive.
At this point she doesn’t want to go home; she knew what she was doing was wrong, but it felt like she belonged.
Off went the clothes, the curling of toes, and passionate love making. She was so wet it poured down her thighs, as his dick split her insides.
The feeling they had together afterwards was satisfying. They told each other that they loved one another but someone was lying… and it wasn’t her, but she wasn’t sure. She knew this would hurt. It fucks up her mind, but this was her only time to find closure, she was only getting older.
She didn’t think she would like it, but she did so she tried to hide it.
She always wore her heart on her sleeves. She knew her love was deeper than his.
She almost wished the sex was whack because then it wouldn’t be hard to ever look back. Now, she knew she loved her husband, that was a fact.
But she was like an addict and he was her crack, her addiction was hard for her to detach.
She knew better than to leave her husband for a man who she knew she could never trust as a lover, but she knew she could trust him as a friend, and that was it… it had to come to an end. No more wondering what could’ve been because if it was meant to be God would have made it that way. Besides, it was a little too late.
Here they were, cheating on the loves of their lives because they never finished what they had. Shit, they both had it bad, but she had it worse because she knew she wasn’t completely his type, hell he liked them white. He knew she was trying too hard to pretend like she was fine. Texting him, calling him all the time just to see what was on his mind.
But he only entertained her because he has a void in his soul, his goal is not to hurt her again but to just stay friends. He has the love of his life, who has two of his kids and he’s already made his choice. Curiosity got the best of him. He doesn’t know what loving a woman means so he’ll always use and abuse the most precious thing.
She confused his curiosity for love….
It was true, you can really be in love with two people at once but one of them is always more important and she knew that for certain.
It was time to close the curtains and go lay with her husband.